even the air will forget

do you remember when we were young and hopeful?
life still made promises then.

the paradise of a moment earlier——
a memory earlier——was fading.
visiting those memories felt like returning,
unwelcome.

the more you remember,
the more has been lost.
almost everything,
almost everything,
but something must linger.

older versions of the self felt distant now.
i always wanted to escape.

i remember damage,
replaced by stranger pieces,
bleeding into unfinished drafts.
even the air will forget you.

i am afraid.

-x, modified 06.22.26

deserve

the floorboards are too loud tonight.
every step——
a breath stolen.

i've stopped listening.

the past is a dangerous route,
i know it well.
the future lies.
so did your words.

the walls forgot your shadow,
your toothbrush collects dust,
even your ash
knew to leave.

i was terrified of it all.

of the space where these scars fade,
where the tears stop knowing your name.
but the hurt was not yours to keep.
neither was i.

you don't deserve to know who i am.

-x